I’m not there yet. I think I’ve gotten to Whinney Sniveling Resignation; as in, “I did the best I could, what with circumstances and all!”
There are actually quite a few times where I can in fact accept my role and responsibility for how my life is going and how I feel about it all. Seeing my role though, tends to partake of an untrue/unclear view of myself and my motivations; because the word “role” is laden with a truth regarding my playing a ‘part’ in various dramas as they seem to just appear in my life.
Taking full responsibility means I can’t use the props of glibness, cleverness, knowingness, sureness and some convenient assertions of awareness, as a form of dodging my real self while investigating my motivations and actions in daily life.
It’s not a good idea to declare “Done!’ when more help and effort are needed from me to live by the Buddhist Dharma, Precepts and Heart.
Sometimes more is required of me, often less. Just allowing a situation to flow and resolve itself without my help (interference) is the hardest part. The basic impulse to help is ok, but it rather quickly gets subsumed into one’s personal story and ‘Role’ in that Part.
Time seems the great moderator for my too quick reaction/responses and I often forget that just a few breaths is often sufficient time for a situation to move towards the Good. All on its own.
Accepting my haste, to offer, to be involved, a neediness to help, to Do Something; as a point of pause for looking, investigating, and most of all allowing things to be as they are. Is for me, the key to All Acceptance. I have to accept myself, as I am, in all my manifestations and an opening appears.
In a Bubble that allows no
Light to the Beings that dwell there,
A small pinprick in the bubble will
Allow sufficient light to enter
So that a different world Appears
Suddenly. Out of Nothing.