floating leaves

I was with myself today.

Apparently sufficient time has passed for me to begin becoming comfortable that not only am I alone, have always been that way and, will continue to be that way.

I have been very fortunate in that I have had good companions along the way; A couple of good relationships, a good long-term marriage and a variety of good friends and acquaintances. So today, having lunch with some good friends I could enjoy it and then go to the store and shop for one.

I still linger at the pet food aisle wondering for a moment whether the cat or dog need anything. Nope. No cat or dog. I am by myself. For some time now I have been surprised at the lonely and needy feelings that came up for me, but I think they are starting to morph into the “What Needs Doing and How Can I Do It Within the Precepts and Zen”? category.

And that’s good.

I am starting to explore, at the request of others (and that means I really have to go carefully because my head swells with even minute caloric changes in ambient temperature of the Self, the possibility of starting a meditation group in Napa. I’m told there is a lot of interest and several people would like me to sort of lead/start it all. That means getting a lot of input and suggestions to see if it is do-able. My first thought is “Non-religious Zen based meditation technique rooted in group discussion centered around essential religious concepts that lean slightly to the Seeking and Recovery modes identification”. I suppose the first thing would be to try and figure out what the previous sentence means. Anyway, lots of questions will arise for me and whether anything gets off the ground is not really the important thing. That will all unfold as I deal with my own intentions and whether or not I am being true to the spirit of my own training as it has been offered to me by my teachers and good spiritual friends.

I hope that anyone who may be reading this (all eight of you, and that may be a wishful number:), would feel they can chime into that field of inquiry and exploration by e-mail, phone or, if proximate, personal conversation.

It’s been raining all day and there’s lots of problems being caused, but nothing that a rich idle society like ours can’t cope with. Most of us seem to encounter gold-plated problems in our lives and we indulge in unhelpful reactions to things that 95% of the world wishes were their privilege. Our problems. Our problems.

The leaves fall from the trees

In the Spring new ones will

Surely grow. Yet, yet; There

Is sadness. Compounded it

Seems, by the sound of rain.

Float, Spin, Twist, Land.

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