In my experience and a degree of observation within myself and of others, it seems we try to express ourselves when speaking about anger by attempting to access cultural and social beliefs as the basic ground for the explanation to the predicament of hate and anger. Actually trying to rationalize our anger/hate into a reasonable position. That is a major aspect of delusion itself; constructing a story within and outside ourselves that finds context as an excuse for our anger/hate.
“If only he, she or they weren’t so…I wouldn’t have too feel this way, etc. “If things were more the way I want them to be, or as they should be, I wouldn’t be so angry.”
To me that’s a good beginning towards easing the justifiable grip of anger, because those are just stories we can become aware of, through the process of sitting still and observing this little ‘Trickster’ we call our mind.
In many of the cultures of our Native population there was the story of the Coyote or Fox who made us see and think things that were not true, tricking us into foolish behaviors. Probably just a way for a Nature-immersed society to formulate aspects of what our own mechanistic society developed as Philosophy/Psychology. One way to subdue this Trickster was to partake in ritual and seeking through a Spirit Quest.
Isn’t that what we are doing in our practice? Trying through the practice of teachings and meditation to be able to see the Trickster for who it is? It is difficult, because it is us!(Appreciative nod to Walt Kelly and his famous ’72 ‘Pogo’ cartoon referencing the ecological disasters becoming visibly evident at that time).
So have we littered and carelessly maintained the landscape within us. The solution to the litter is to see what’s there, how it got there, how to begin cleaning it up and how to create less of it. All of that takes caring. Caring is another word for Compassion without extra emotionalism and more actual understanding, without judgement or an assigning of blame.
The really hard part is to accept responsibility and then go slowly, with deliberation, towards a solution without going astray towards blame and judgement…
Always, we seem to come back to trying to be still. Within and without.
So it seems we have to deal with anger and hate by first mitigating the story of how understandable and relatable our angers and hates are, because misery does love company.
My difficulty has always been the deep love and belief of my story, about me, told too me, in my favorite voice in the world, my own. No wonder it’s seductive; It is completely me. What could be better? Nothing, that’s what.
To loosen the grip on my self, first requires a good look at my life’s actual environment and then find the space and time to deliberately engage in being physically still enough and begin to see my thoughts and feelings over time as they come and go, they come and, they go. And, once I can be comfortable with that, I can begin a slow, again deliberate, looking into the process and, the content of it.
That is one way we can help convert our anger and our hatred from the solidity and fixedness of hurricane and tempest into puffs, whisps and sometimes puffy clouds of emotional weather events that appear and change and go on and will re-appear.
Over a period of time our disturbed climate will change back to its more natural balance.
Personally, of course I still have do deal with all of this “stuff”, and I have a fair idea of what I’m dealing with and it’s never easy. And sometimes I just have to seek sturdy shelter and hunker down; Sooner or later the Sun will re-appear and I have learned something. Or not. Another opportunity will present itself
I take Refuge in the Buddha. I take Refuge in Dharma. I take Refuge in the Sangha.
Seeking the impossible, I
Found over time, that being
Still allowed the possible to
Just walk on in and sit down.
Now I have to learn how to
Treat this unexpected company.